the big nOte files - february 2004

updated: 2004/02/08 & 2004/02/22

First things first: I'm looking for anyone who can get me in contact with Antoine Occhipinty.
I'm told that Antoine released a Zappa tribute album, but don't have more info.
Has anyone any info on this?  -- >


ZZZZZ The Central Scrutinizer Band
ZZZZZ Vinnie Colaiuta
ZZZZZ The Blue Devils performed and recorded Frank Zappa's 'Echidna's Arf (Of You)'
ZZZZZ An interview with the Ant-Bee
ZZZZZ "Creatures", the latest album by Frogg Café
ZZZZZ A new album by the PrimeTime Sublime Community Orchestra: "A Life In A Day Of A Microorganism"
ZZZZZ Chris Opperman, on very short notice
ZZZZZ Van Kemenade - Palinckx 2 - Sparly perform Zappa's 'Son Of Mr.Green Genes'
ZZZZZ the latest Palinckx album (from 2002), called "Henry"
ZZZZZ Ian Underwood
ZZZZZ Chunga's Revenge, from Salt Lake City
ZZZZZ an Austin update
ZZZZZ Don Preston's Akashic Ensemble will be touring in April
ZZZZZ additions & corrections to the Robert Martin discography
ZZZZZ The Metropolis Orchestra will perform a Zappa tribute on 2004/02/18 in Milan, Italy
ZZZZZ Breakfastime
ZZZZZ Cucamonga radio show featured the Ensemble Modern and Dietmar Bonnen
ZZZZZ NoneRadio by Mike Keneally and Rich Pike
ZZZZZ The Rare Bird mystery revealed
ZZZZZ Hans Annéllsson's "One More Time For The World Some More" album
ZZZZZ News from the International Conference of Esemplastic Zappology
ZZZZZ Taco The Wonderdog plays Beefheart and Zappa
ZZZZZ Chris Opperman
ZZZZZ Christophe Delbrouck's latest book on FZ & the MOI
ZZZZZ Guy Darol's book on FZ
ZZZZZ James 'Birdlegs' Youmans sent in some extra info
ZZZZZ Joe Satriani DVD: the satch tapes
ZZZZZ John Guerin
ZZZZZ The Residents
ZZZZZ John Trubee
ZZZZZ A nice picture of your mothers
ZZZZZ Hawaiian Tan Ratface
ZZZZZ The Foolz
ZZZZZ The Muffin Men
ZZZZZ Sandy Hurvitz
ZZZZZ Rose Marie Zappa
ZZZZZ Marc Guillermont 
ZZZZZ Bogus Pomp
ZZZZZ and the concert calendar


Hi, I would like to report that I have found some Zappa related music on the recent Jefferson Airplane re-issue of the "Crown of Creation" album. Released August 19, 2003. RCA has released this classic title yet again (under the BMG Heritage label) as part of the Jefferson Airplane Original Masters series. This time, the disc contains 5 bonus cuts (one being an untitled hidden track tacked onto the end of track 15). One of the bonus tracks (credited to Frank Zappa / Grace Slick) is called "Would You Like a Snack". It had been released on the "Jefferson Airplane Loves You" box set in 1992 and is known to fans. But another track (not credited to Zappa but to Spencer Dryden) called "The Saga of Sydney Spacepig" is released legit here for the first time, and it contains without a doubt Zappa contributions. You can here parts of the song "The Air" fading in and out, and Zappa type Snorts and grunts are heard throughout. "The Saga of Sydney Spacepig" has been on bootleg before, but the version on this new "Crown of Creation" CD is a very different and seems to be a more realized mix. Just thought the die-hard Zappa fans should check this out.

-- info: Kenn

The Oxford Street Brass is performing at 4:00 PM, Sunday, January 11, 2004 at the First Congregational Church, on 1985 Louis Road in Palo Alto. We will be performing works for brass quintet, sometimes accompanied by the mighty and majestic First Congregational Church pipe organ. The concert will include pieces by Malcolm Arnold, J. S. Bach, Richard Strauss and Charles Ives, and a tango by Astor Piazzola. We'll top it off with a unique arrangement of "Peaches En Regalia" for brass quintet by yours truly.

-- info: Ken Walter

Tune in to Wisconsin Public Radio's Sunday Afternoon Live from the Elvehjem today at 12:30pm CST to hear the Sotto Voce Tuba Quartet. Among the several pieces they will be performing during the hour-and-a-half program is Echidna's Arf. The WPR News and Classical network can be listened to via the web right here: If you happen to be in Madison, drop by the Elvehjem for the concert. "Sunday Afternoon Live" is free to the public, as is admission to the museum.

-- info: Kevin McDonald The article is about a musical theatre staging of "You Are What You Is" that's in preparation in Sandviken, Sweden. No dates are specified, but apparently it will be this fall. And before you start ridiculing the beautiful language in which the article is written, please note that I actually bothered to translate most of it this time: === "Beauty knows no pain" is one of the twenty complex and musically tricky songs on Zappa's album "You are what you is" from 1981. The entire upcoming show is based on the tracks from that album. How did the whole thing really happen? - The idea to make a show with singer Per-Erik Sortti in a leading role has been in my head for a while. He hasn't been used fully as the good actor and singer that he is. At the same time, I have felt like doing something with Frank Zappa's music. "You are what you is" happened to have the theme I was looking for, it's about different roles and the songs are rather short. The subject was suitable to write lyrics about. Today is so much about "you're not good enough" - reality shows and plastic surgery - always the striving to re-make yourself, Lena Mattsson says. So "You are what you is" became "Du är den du blev" ["You are what you became"] and Frank Zappa's 80's was turned into the Swedish present. For example, "Charlie's enormous mouth" becomes "Lindas enorma bröst" ["Linda's enourmous breasts" - Linda is a Swedish reality show star - ed.], "I'm a beautiful guy" is turned into "Jag, en dokuperson" ["Me, a reality-person"] and "Teenage wind" into "Tonårsdröm" ["Teenage dream"]. - What was hip and satirical in the US in the 80's doesn't work in the 21st century in Sweden. That's why I dropped the idea of translating the lyrics and focused on writing new ones. But they're written in Zappa's spirit: daring to be audacious, not apologize and to provoke - to do what you want. Earlier that morning they'd met keyboard player Mats Öberg at the Gävle Central where he arrived in a train from Stockholm. Öberg has played with Zappa and has big experience of his compositions. Mats Öberg is blind since birth and may look lost when he leaves the train. But in the musical world he finds his way anywhere. His ear is second to none. Bertil Fält puts him in front of the synth and places his right hand over the buttons and tells him what functions they have. That's all that Mats needs to sound exactly like Zappa wanted Tommy Mars to when the album was recorded 23 years ago. Öberg joins only once a month during the preparations, but it's obvious what a musical force he is, and his presence feels necessary to make this project come to frution. With Mats Öberg in the band, the public interest might increase, and the project might stretch further that the planned ten performances in Gävle. The Zappa family, headed by widow Gail, is known to be ticklish about how his material is being treated. So Gail has been contacted and the new lyrics has been translated back to English for final approval. - Yes, I know she's difficult, but if Gail troubles us, we'll have to use the original lyrics, says Lena Mattsson, seemingly without worrying about the hundreds of hours of effort she's put into it. === All linguistic atrocities should be blamed on the translator, not the journalist.

-- info: Jon Naurin


Q+A with Youngblood Brass Band January 16, 2004 Take a Wisconsin-made meat grinder found at a New Orleans yard sale and cram it full with a sousaphone, a snare drum, a bass drum, two trombones, a sax, two trumpets, and eight people who can play the hell out of these ingredients. Then stuff in a liberal dose of hip-hop inventiveness and start crankin'. Fry this up with a healthy portion of cultural consciousness, and oo-wee, you've got the delicious (and nutritious) Youngblood Brass Band. spoke with Youngblood MC/snare drummer David Henzie-Skogen, in Cajun accents as far as you know.

Where's the Beefheart? Sarah Dempster pays tribute to the Magic Band, reformed without its infamous Captain Saturday January 17, 2004 The Guardian,11710,1124751,00.html

On Jan. 27, the Fulcrum Point New Music Project launches its "Essential Art: Essential Elements" series at the Harris Theater with "Oceans," which includes works by John Cage, Fela Kuti, George Crumb and Frank Zappa. ($20; 312-334-7777).

-- info: Hoodude

Absolute Ensemble and Adelaide Symphony Orchestra perform Absolute Zappa at Adelaide Town Hall, 9pm, on March 8, and Blood on the Floor at Adelaide Town Hall, 8pm, on March 9.
conductor Kristjan Jarvi


If you speak Portuge, you may want to check out,

The Central Scrutinizer Band played a gig somewhere in Brasil recently, and they'll play another one in a couple of days.


Vinnie Colaiuta plays the drums on the latest Mike Stern album, "These Times". Out on ESC Records.

-- info: Zjakki Willems


  • the blue devils:
    through the years 1984 - 1989

        (1997, cd, usa, the blue devils 03)
    • The Blue Devils are a marching member drum & bugle corps, from Concord, California, USA. They count 128 playing members and have won various awards and released various albums as well.
      The booklet says that the World Championships have an audience of about 30.000 people !!
      Track 4, from the 1987 performance in Madison, includes a percussion feature based on  Frank Zappa's 'Echidna's Arf (Of You)'.
      Well, it sure is something else...


There's an interview with Billy James, the Ant-Bee, on the Nucleus website:

click on "interviews" and search the alphabetical listing.


  • frogg café: creatures
        (2003, cd, usa, private release)
    • "Creatures" is Frogg Café's second album. Frogg Café started out as Lumpy Gravy, a Zappa / Mothers tribute band, and recorded their first album as Frogg Café in 2001.
      With "Creatures", the band continues the direction they took with their untitled debut album: progressive rock with jazz and experimental ingredients.
      'The Celestial Metal Can', track 3, is a tribute to Charles Ives. Experimental and almost psychedelic.
      Fans of Mats & Morgan and of Mike Keneally will most certainly embrace this beautiful album. I sure did.


  • the primetime sublime:
    a life in a day of a mircoorganism

        (2004, cd, usa, private release)
    • Composer and PrimeTime Sublime Community Orchestra MasterMind (PTSCOMM) Paul Minotto calls it New? Music. Now I hear you ask: "What the *** is New? Music", and my answer would be: "Look at the picture on the right", because the album cover gives you enough clues. The New? Music on "A Life In A Day Of A Microorganism" supplies you with images. Images created by audio collages: a mixture of contemporary classical music and various audio fragments from various sources (think both  time & space). The human race explained through the world of the amoebe.
      I like this album very much. It's fun, it's entertaining, and it's educational as well. :-)
    • Check out:


news from Chris Opperman, on very short notice:

Hey everyone!

Quick update to let you know that I will be playing a solo set at The Cat Club on Sunset (8911 Sunset Blvd., W. Hollywood, CA, on Tuesday starting at 8:20.  The cover is $5 with this e-mail and I hope to see you there!  You can tell me what you think about my beard. 

Also, I'd like to thank everyone who has pre-ordered "No Memories, Please."  The response has been really terrific.  However, I'm not quite at where I need to be to be able to afford to manufacture the CD's, so if you've been waiting to pre-order, now would be an excellent time!  Or if you do not yet have "Oppy Music I" or "Klavierstucke," now would also be an excellent time to pick those up and complete your collection!

You can order the CD's here:

Thank you so much and music is the best.

-- Chris Opperman

I received this message on Saturday the 21st, so I'm assuming that 'next Tuesday' is February the 24th  !!



Early 2004, Bert and Jacques Palinckx teamed up with Paul van Kemenade and Hans Sparla to tour as van Kemenade - Palinckx 2 - Sparla. It had been 20 years since these musicians had first played together.

During this short tour in Holland, their setlist included Frank Zappa's 'Son Of Mr.Green Genes'.


  • Bert Palinckx: bass
  • Jacques Palinckx: guitar
  • Paul Van Kemenade: alt sax
  • Hans Sparla: trombone


  • 2004/01/31 concert 'plusetage', baarle-nasseau, the netherlands
    • Yes, I was there and this was a very fine concert. They played some older compositions, from the first Palinckx recordings, but also some new material, especially written for this tour. Lots of room for improvisitions and all four musicians contributed an excellent part to this concert.


  • palinckx: henry
        (2002, cd, nl, vonk 9)
    • March 2001 saw the premiere of "Henry" a contribution between Palinckx, the Asko Ensemble and theatre group Drie Ons. I never caught the show, but I'm glad that it got recorded.
      The album is subtitled "15 Scenes About A Threesome Man". Henry has a multiple personality syndrome, resulting in the fact that Henry cannot really understand reality.
      15 scenes, or 15 compositions by Jacq Palinckx and lyrics by Hans Buhrs. A very impressive album that shows a side of Palinckx that I wasn't familiar with.


Have just seen the film "The Four Feathers" (2002) and see that Ian Underwood is listed under Synthesizer Programming, with Randy Kerber.

-- info: Richard Witt



In 1999, Ike Willis toured with Chunga's Revenge, from Salt Lake City, a band put together and managed by Steve Auerbach, who also played with the band.

line-up: Ralph Mason, Steve Auerbach, Donna Gibbons, Dale Lee, Ike Willis, Burch Moon, Bob Smith, Tara Duff and John Flanders.


The Austin scene does know its Zappa. Check out the following links:

- Added data, including discography for Groovin Ground
- Added discography for Raisedbyaliens



Don Preston's Akashic Ensemble will be touring in April:

2004/04/02 WPRB LIVE Webcast+ FM Broadcast !!  
2004/04/03 'Synapse Studios', Red bank 
2004/04/04 'Downtown music gallery', NYC
2004/04/05 'Tritone', Philly

-- info: André Cholmondeley


Charles Ulrich sent some corrections & updates for the Robert Martin discography.

Thank you Charles.

I also added the superb "Purple Cucumber" album:

various artists: the purple cucumber
    (2003, cd, italy, auditorium audizioni 01003) = zappa tribute album, incl.fragments of various zappa compositions


The Italian Metropolis Orchestra will be performing a Zappa tribute concert on Wednesday, february 18, in Milano, Italy at the Via Ascanio Sforza, 49.

More info at:

-- info: Alessandro Baglioni


recorded Frank Zappa's 'Aybe Sea' for an upcoming Zappa Surf album on Cordelia records.

Here's a short chat with John Hancock: (from October 2003)

UM: Who are you & where are you from?

John Hancock: BREAKFASTIME is a moniker I've used for many years as a sideman for various singers/etc.  BT is a multi-instrumentalist/producer type guy.  BREAKFASTIME has appeared on numerous records, last couple of years he's been popping up on various compilations as a solo act doing stuff like David Bowie's "Golden Years"  (1995's "Only Bowie" comp on defunct  Austin label Only Boy) to a Shadowy Men cover (Deep Eddy Records, couple of years ago) and recently "Jesus Christ Surferstar" on OMOM Records (Italy).  Also a new comp early next year on Deep Eddy Records called "Texas Guitar Showdown" which will have an original cut called "Maddison County".  I also released a solo CD single in 2001 of a cover of Gershwin's "Rhapsody and Blues"-also available from Deep Eddy Records ( Phil Dirt at Reverb Central has given me a couple of real good reviews and some airplay as well.
I have a full album of instrumentals sittin' in the can if you know anybody that's interested in that sort of thing...


UM: What kind of music do you normally play?  

John Hancock: Various stuff from the punk rock/c&w/blues/jazz/heavy metal disco school

UM: Are you a Surf kind of person or band?

John Hancock: Surfed once, hurt my back.  Love the beach, though

UM: Is it your way of life?

John Hancock: Someday I will return to my hometown of Galveston, Texas and I'll never have to worry about sand in my shoes again...

UM: Do you really want to live in California?

John Hancock: I lived in California for about five years - Texas Beach is nice too.  If I can ever get this full album out I'll return to the Golden State and rock the house.

UM: Do you play (have you ever played) other Zappa compositions?

John Hancock: Oh yeah. A thing we do here in Austin in October is called "Frank Zappa Hoot night" wherin various local musicians interpret Zappa tunes for a most appreciative audience.  It's a benefit show for the American Cancer Society and a lot of fun.  Happens again tomorrow night.  This year my band is called "Saint Breakfastime's Memorial Pancake Bar-B-Que" and features Walter Daniels (Jack 'O Fire, Big Foot Chester, South Filthy) on harmonica and Ralph White (Bad Livers, Solo Artist) on Kalimba.
Last years band was called "The Creamcheeze Incident" Whole different thing.

UM: Put them on record?

John Hancock: This will be the first Zappa composition on record for me.  I'm thinking of making a Zappa tribute page for my website and having some music from these shows on there-I want people to hear my (fuzz bass) version of "Watermelon in Easter Hay" and my original composition "This One's for Frank"
I really need to update my websit with this stuff, though.
p.s. it's

UM: How did you find out about Alan's Zappa Surf Project?

John Hancock: Ted James at Deep Eddy Records sent me the contact info.  Thanks, Ted!

UM: What was first: the project or your track? In other words, were you already playing a Zappa Surf Classic before you heard of Alan's project, or did you start working on it after you found out about the project?

John Hancock: The project dictated the need for Zappa Surf music.  I  answered the call.  The music is our master. We just get to hold the guitars and act cool.

UM: How did you choose the Zappa composition?

John Hancock: It just jumped out at me as having Surfin' possibilities (it's about the Sea, I think...)

UM: Is it your favourite Zappa composition or just the one that needs a Surf Treatment?

John Hancock:  Whichever one I'm learning or playing right now is the fave - a guy can learn a lot about music from this stuff.

UM: Any other comments?

John Hancock: Thanks for asking!  Also check out

UM: Thank you, John.


additions to the Others of Invention section:


Hah, the joy of living in Belgium.

January 12, 2004, the Cucamonga radio show featured the Ensemble Modern

January 26, 2004, it featurend Alexei Aigui and Dietmar Bonnen



a message from Rich Pike

Just wanted to let you know, the new season of NoneRadio starts Feb 9, at
-- NoneRadio is hosted by Rich Pike & Mike Keneally, with special guest co-hosts Joe Travers & Kent Huffnagle. (Keneally played guitar w/FZ, Joe is the FZ Vaultmeister AND drummer for Z, Dweezil etc, and Kent worked with him on the 'Baby Snakes' DVD. Rich is just Canadian.)
As one might suppose, there will be much talking about the 'Baby Snakes' DVD, plus some fun rare FZ, and a lot of other music as well. Shows are 3 to 4 hours in length, often start late, and repeat 24/7 throughout the week. Thanks! Check it out if you can and bookmark it while you're there.

-- rp


  • rare bird: rare sympathy
        (??, cd-bootleg, ??, ??)
    • This is the one I was talking about last time. The Rare Bird bootleg called "Rare Sympathy". It's a live recording and includes a performance of Frank Zappa's 'King Kong'.

info: Chris Warot


  • hans annéllsson:
    one more time for the world some more

        (2002, cd, swe, anncd 8)
    • This album is a bit over a year old, but as it is new to United-Mutations, I'm happy to include it. Hans Annéllsson's latest album is called "One More Time For The World Some More" and Hans says in the liner notes that he also could have called it "Songs You Shouldn't Cover" or even "Covers From Hell".
      The disc presents 16 tracks: 4 compositions by Hans Annéllsson, 4 Yes tracks, 2 King Crimson compositions and 1 Zappa, 1 Lennon, 1 Genesis, 1 Beatles and 1 Brian Eno song. Zappa's 'What's The Ugliest Of Your Body?' has a very fine slide guitar, backed by some sort of 'Be In My Video' beat and some Ruben-esque doo-wop background vocals. This is really good. Annéllsson's own compositions are very impressive as well, 'Anabolic Parabolic' being my favourite one.
      True, some people say that there are songs or artists that one shouldn't cover, but I'm glad Hans Annéllsson didn't care about that.
      "... Some More" is an excellent album, and it desperately needs your attention !!
    • order your copy at:

ICE-Z: International Conference of Esemplastic Zappology

A note from Esther and Ben at Militantesthetix to inform you that ...

ICE-Z: International Conference of Esemplastic Zappology

... which took place at Theatro Technis on Crowndale Road on Friday, 16 January 2004, has now been put ONLINE ...

inscrutable philosophical papers ... sentimental reminiscences ... poodle revelations ... golden turds & Zen Buddhism ... Peter Frampton's wrist array ... the true meaning of HRATCHE-PLCHE & Kaiser Rolls ... Cheepnis versus the commercial sublime ... materialist polemic ... rocket science ... insane grafts ... cute photographs of delegates in front of the speakers' pink satin tablecloth (stills from Esther's camcorder or Bruno Le Tohic's camera) ... anti-Mojo ranting ... pearls from the Output Marco-Structure (Maurizi extensions) ... photos of the drinking and dancing to Zappa records at the College Bar ... Evil Dick & the Banned Members ... Les Fils de l'Invention in wigs and drag portraying Francesco Zappa (fl. 1763-88) ... a freakmap of Crowndale Road ... late-nite discussions in front of anti-Nyman placards ... as advertised on a slip of paper given to select members of the audience for the Grandmothers with Don Preston, Roy Estrada & Napoleon Murphy Brock at the Borderline last night ... the secret word is:

PS: People in London (or those anywhere who can access webradio on listen to Resonance 104.4 FM at 2pm (GMT)  on Wednesday to hear Brendon Burton on Beefheart, politics and world music !!!  !!! !!! !!!

Get you to
Jeder Mensch seine eigene Website.........

-- info: Esther Leslie


Welcome to the tape-manipulated world of Taco The Wonderdog.
  • taco the wonderdog: covers the hits
        (??, cdr, ??, private release)
    • The complete album is available for download at Taco's site.
      It includes 'Moonlight On Vermont' and 'Egypt Sue' (Van Vliet) as well as Zappa's 'Love Of My Live' and Renaldo & The Loaf's 'Lime Jelly Grass'.


Zappanale is THE Zappa music festival. In a couple of months, the fifteenth edition will take place and once again, it looks like it will be great.

In the meantime, the arf-boys are releasing a 3-cd set and a 3 DVD retrospective on Zappanale 14.

Mick Zeuner says:


Hi Folks!

The time for slaving over a hot stopwatch in their dungeon of despair is finally over: the naughty Arfs be proud to unleash the music and films from their latest summertime adventure on Mo. Feb. 9, 2004.

Yes! Zappanale # 14 on a 3CD-Box and 3 DVDs - to hold in your sweaty little mitts.

Do you want it? Answer: 'Yes' or 'No'

You'll love it...     or

Zappanale # 15
July 23 - 25, 2004
Bad Doberan

Did you know that the Zappanale 12 album exists with two different covers?

Check out:

And if that isn't enough, the arf-society will be releasing another album. This one's a bonus for those who buy a Zappanale ticket.
It isn't out yet, but it'll look something like this:

Just take a look at these names. Wow:

  1. jazzprojekt hundehagen: sexual harassment in the workplace

  2. zappanoia: zoot allures

  3. octafish: medley: let’s move to cleveland / dupree’s paradise / trouble every day/ big swifty / the torture never stops

  4. doctor dark: big-eyed beans from venus

  5. the jack & jim show: willie the pimp

  6. sheik yerbouti: i’m the slime

  7. alternative tv: why don’tcha do me right?

  8. muffin men: wonderful wino

  9. muffin men: bamboozled by love

  10. paul green school of rock music: don’t eat the yellow snow

  11. paul green school of rock music: nanook rubs it

  12. prawns with horns: magic fingers

  13. sex without nails bros: uncle remus

  14. sex without nails bros: rdnzl

  15. sex without nails bros: bobby brown goes down

  16. stu grimshaw & ike willis: der fremde

  17. mike keneally & friends: you’re probably wondering why i’m here

  18. mike keneally & friends: cucamonga

  19. mike keneally & friends: skull bubbles

  20. steffen moddrow: cheap industry blues



news from Chris Opperman

From: Chris Opperman
Sent: Sunday, February 01, 2004
Subject: [Chris Opperman] "No Memories, Please" Pre-order Announcement!


I'm happy to announce that we are now accepting pre-orders for my third studio album, "No Memories, Please."  Produced mostly by myself and Mike Keneally, the album is comprised of duets recorded during the sessions for "Klavierstücke" and features Rachel Arellano on vocals, Robert Thomspon on violin, Ben Adams on vibraphone, Marc Ziegenhagen on mini-moog, and Mike Keneally on acoustic and electric guitar, bass guitar, vocals, and piano.  It's a really beautiful album and I'm very proud of it.  Hopefully you will be too.

To pre-order, simply visit this page:  The price is $15, plus $2.50 for domestic shipping and $5.00 for overseas shipping.  I will be happily signing the first 250 pre-orders.  I'm counting on being able to sell out of the pre-orders in order to pay the manufacturing costs for the album, so I would appreciate it greatly if you would order one and tell your friends to do the same!  Our target release date is Tuesday, April 20th.  If you have any problems ordering, please do not hesitate to e-mail me @

After I get this album out, I will be finishing up a live compliation of some of the cool performances we've captured over the last two years that will feature various incarnations of Chris Opperman & Friends as well as some solo material and material from Special Opps for release this summer.  We're hoping to make enough money from these two releases to fund the recording of the "Special Opps" studio album, which will hopefully be released in the first quarter of 2005.

In the meantime, I'm still working, working, working on the Vai orchestrations and getting ready for the Holland performances this May.  For those of you who have been waiting for another L.A. performance, the "No Memories, Please" CD release party has been tentatively scheduled for Wednesday, April 21st at The Mint in Los Angeles.  More information will be posted when available.

For a complete track listing and more info regarding "No Memories, Please," there is a rough draft discography entry that you can check out @  From that page you can also download two of the songs from the album for free: "Kamp Keneally" and "Cynthia H."

Thank you so much for all your support!  Music *is* the best.

Chris Opperman
Present-day Composer


  • christophe delbrouck:
    frank zappa & les mères de l'invention
        (2003, book, france, le castor astral)
    • Now here's something else. 360 pages and a stunning front cover by comic book artist Solé, and this is only the first in a series of three.
      Christophe Delbrouck takes on Zappa's early years. He starts with Zappa's childhood, the Bicycle Concerto, Studio Z in Cucamonga and focusses on my favourite band of all time, the Mothers Of Invention, ending in 1971 with the Montreux fire.
      I like this book. It does not present stuff that is new or revealing, but it does give a very fine chronological listing of what happened and of how certain things came about. Delbrouck cites a lot from interviews with Zappa but also with the Mothers, which makes the book very enjoyable reading. It's like he had all these people around a table, telling him what it was like in these early days.
      If your native tongue is French, you shouldn't hesitate. This is the best book on Zappa & the Mothers that you can find.
      If you speak another language, but you're able to read French, you might want to give this one a try. It's not too tough to read and it's a very enjoyable book 


  • guy darol: l'amérique en deshabillé
        (2003, book, france, le castor astral)
    • In "L'amérique en déshabillé" ("America Undressed" or "America Exposed") Guy Darol investigates Frank Zappa's collisions with 'America': censorship, religion, freedom of speech, war, pornography, voter registration, ...
      It's not about Frank Zappa, the composer, but it's all about Frank Zappa, the artist who showed America's real face.
      Be warned that this is not the easiest book to read. A notion of French is not enough. Ask my dictionary.
      But if you can read French, "L'amérique en déshabillé" will show you an impressive aspect of Frank Zappa, defender of the truth and of the freedom of speech.



Additional info on the James 'Birdlegs' Youmans story & discography:

    From: Birdlegs
    January 2004

I filled in for Frank's bass player (Tom Fowler) in 1974 when he broke a finger while on tour.  It was fast and furious but wonderful fun and quite challenging.  I was fortunate enough to cut some tracks with him at Caribou Studios near Neaderlands Colorado.  Some of the tracks were used on the "One Size Fits All" and the "Laether" albums.  I don't know if any are on other albums or not.  Frank was a workaholic like myself, and we spent a lot of after hours at caribou in the studio.  It was great to work with one of the great masters of our time.  The world doesn't yet fully know his genius.  It was obscured by the "pop" (If you can call it that) stuff he had to do to pay the bills.  How would one pay the bills writing orchestral music these days?  I hope his good stuff someday will get played.

After years of playing every kind of music you can think of, I finally returned to my roots (My Dad was a Baptist Preacher) and since 1997 I only perform gospel music.  My style oddly enough is mountain gospel since I use and play mostly acoustic instruments.  After so many years of high decibel music I've come to love the quiter instruments, tho the music is still up beat.

In 1997 I realease two CD's - How Beautiful Heaven Must Be, and Gospel Ship.  In 1998 I released my third CD, Turn Your Radio On.  In 1999 I then release Lord Build Me A Cabin In The Corner Of Gloryland and then in 2002 my fifth CD was titled Angel Band.  More information is available at my website,  I still perform more that 100 dates a year.

I have an incredible 48 track fully automated studio in Covington, GA where I produce and record mostly gospel music for myself and many others.  God has truly blessed me since I "made my way back home!"

Hope this helps in some way.

Yours truly,

-- Birdlegs



  • joe satriani: the satch tapes
        (2003, dvd, usa, sony music 202262 9)
    • Previously out on vhs video, this documentary shows Joe Satriani in his studio, live and through his videoclips. (Short) interviews with the Bissonette Brothers, Steve Vai and Spinal Tap guitarist Nigel whatshisname.
      This is a nice warm-up for the new Vai DVD.


    from: Jeffery Stein
    Sent: Monday, February 02, 2004

In the John Guerin discography you missed the Todd Rundgren Lp. Ballad of. (1971 Ampex)

-- Js

Thank Jeffery, addition has been made.


  • the residents: demons dance alone
        (2004, dvd, ger, euroralph)
    • What can I tell you about this DVD? This is the official, regular release of "Demons Dance Alone", the beautiful and latest epic by The Residents.
      Maybe you don't care, or maybe you already have the promotional release that was sold during the DDA tour?
      Anyway, this is essential stuff. If you never saw The Residents live, this is a perfect introduction. If you have seen them live, I know that you won't hesitate.

      Essential stuff.

  • the residents: disfigured night
        (2004, dvd, usa, ralphamerica ra 016)
    • In august 1997, the Eyeballed Ones performed Disfigured Night at the PopKomm music festival in Köln, Germany. The show was broadcast by VIVA TV, the German music station. 
      This DVD presents the original VIVA broadcast, as well as new, edited version.

      Limited release, 1350 copies, and a beautiful package (cover by Steve Cerio). The book has the same format as the DDA-director's cut edition.

I told you last time that there was a Gianteyeballs' tribute to the Residents awaiting your download on the net. Well, the tracks have only been there for a very short while, but they were there.

Here's the list:

-- info: Ive Hapers




John Trubee, leader of the band THE UGLY JANITORS OF AMERICA, in conjunction with the Real Time Opera Company will present a production of Trubee's quasi-opera HAWAIIAN TAN RATFACE at San Francisco's Studio Z on Wednesday evening, February 11th, 2004. The production unfolds the allegory of its main character, OUR BELEAGUERED PROTAGONIST, as he encounters various conflicts, enemies, and travails in an absurdist spiritual sojourn. OUR BELEAGUERED PROTAGONIST encounters the vicious LITTLE MAN, the 3 BITCHES, THE FINGER-WAGGING PLATITUDE UTTERERS, and THE SEXPOT VAMP with the brain-damaged DOGMEN in the DESERT BEYOND TIME, among others.
The music will be performed by THE UGLY JANITORS OF AMERICA, the actors featured are from THE BELRON GORGON THEATER TROUPE, and THE CARL FRANZONI DANCERS will augment the action with their psychedelic gyrations.
The music was composed by John Trubee with additional material composed by Jack Vees.
Also on the bill will be local band LUCID as well as a set featuring original compositions performed by JACK VEES. Additional guests TBA.

Performance begins promptly at 8:00 PM, door cover is $10, 21 and over with ID.


Contact info: Studio Z (415) 252-7666  -  314 11th St. @ Folsom, SF, CA  -
John Trubee (707) 575-7652  -  PO Box 4921, Santa Rosa, CA 95402  -  e-mail: <>

A picture out of Carl Franzoni's collection
l to r: jimmy carl black, frank zappa, ray collins, elliot ingber, carl franzoni, some nice girls and roy estrada 


Here's a glimpse, right from Trubee, the paranoid maniac from hell:

February 11th, 2004

(Songs From The Bottom Of The Human Socioeconomic Dungheap)
Copyright c 2003 John Trubee

Music & Libretto by John Trubee
Recitatives by Jack Vees

ORIGIN OF THE TITLE: In early 2001 I was employed performing menial clerical drudgery at a hedge fund in California. The company was owned by Microsoft Corporation and was in the process of being sold. Microsoft promised all employees of the firm a hefty retention bonus if we remained employed at the company through its sale.
Daily I was screamed at by a plain-looking 27 year old shrewish woman named Juli who had seniority over me. The last worker who confronted Juli about her ugly behavior was summarily fired. I endured her abuse solely to snag my retention bonus check and then get the hell out . Daily being screamed at by Juli and by other bitches at the firm resembled running a gauntlet enduring the blows of vicious little demons. 'My Hope Is A Broken Dog Fading Beneath The Tide' is a phrase I invented to describe my unfortunate employment at the firm and my depressed attitude about it at the time.
Juli was unattractive to me and become ever more so as she continued to scream at me. Her eyes were black and beady; she bore a resemblance to a rat. I positioned my work at my desk so that I would not have to face her or look at her, as we sat at adjacent desks. She sensed my revulsion towards her and her shriekings at me became ever more shrill.
She went on vacation to Hawaii and came back with a healthy tan. I looked at her and thought to myself "You can go to Hawaii and get a nice Hawaiian tan but that doesn't alter the fact that you have a rat's face".
Shortly thereafter Microsoft sold the hedge fund, I received my retention bonus check, and I then promptly quit the company.
Goodbye, Hawaiian Tan Ratface.

SCENE: Here and now today and forevermore.
Contemporary 21st Century USA.


A humble Everyman  whose illusions get ripped away with each successive trauma and conflict and who tenaciously attempts to maintain his sense of  humor and inner happiness despite life's disappointments.

LITTLE MAN--bullying tyrant who unrelentingly verbally excoriates OBP and who narrowly escapes a raid by the vice squad at the whorehouse and who, accompanied by a whorehouse floozy, flees to Europe with funds he embezzled from the bank where he was a trustee.

MIXED GROUP MALE AND FEMALE--finger wagging platitude utterers.

3 OFFICE BITCHES: RATFACED JULIE, SNOTHEAD KAREN, and NAZI SONIA. They wear exposed football shoulder pads and blue jeans. They viciously beat OBP with large rubber dildos and shriek at him during THE GAUNTLET sequence.

LUCRE LUST--male character who goads, taunts, teases, and humiliates OPM using a cash/carrot combo on a string on a stick during THE GAUNTLET sequence.


2 MALES & 2 FEMALES--Human Punch & Judy Show characters who smack each other with plastic bats in a tiresome, mechanical, and predictable vignette.

MIXED GROUP MALE & FEMALE--playing tug of war to demonstrate the tiresomeness of collective struggles and battles between groups and organizations.

THE STARVING DOG--OBP undergoes a radical transformation in a weird dream sequence and learns something in the process.

LADY WITH THE PINK PURSE--mystery woman, a vampish sexpot in THE DESERT BEYOND TIME in MYTH OF THE STARVING DOG sequence who feeds the snarling, vicious dogmen raw porterhouse steaks out of  her pink purse but who, of course, disdains the starving dog/OBP.

3 SEVERELY BRAIN-DAMAGED DOGMEN--snarling, vicious dogmen bite and snarl at the LADY WITH THE PINK PURSE who willingly feeds them. The 3 dogman have distinctive personalities:

THE CHAIN SMOKER is a chain smoker whose mouth is crammed with a ludicrous number of unlit cigs which he attempts to light with a long-flamed lighter; the second dogman, THE LIAR, has bongo drums hanging from a strap around his neck which he alternately waters with a child's gaily decorated flower watering can and drums upon to garner the woman's favor and attention; and lastly THE DRUGGIE, who ties off with a rubber hose and shoots up with a comically oversized hypodermic needle. He nods off lying flat on the stage floor as the woman flops a raw steak onto his face.

DANCE TROUPE--2 men and 4 women dance at various times in an area of the stage exclusively reserved for them. They may join the actors in selected areas of vignettes when and where deemed appropriate at the discretion of the director/stage manager.


Band performs 2 instrumental tunes:

1. The Electric Love Nudity Supreme

2. Struggling Against Bullshit & Lies (Ratface Theme)
The band performs the first two instrumental pieces accompanied by dancers (2 men and 4 women) and groovy flashing stage lights.

Band performs background vamp accompanying first vignette:

3. The Little Man Torture Sequence


NARRATOR: Our Beleaguered Protagonist awoke at dawn one morning to find the obnoxious and hateful Little Man screaming at him and smashing his head against the stage floor.

OUR BELEAGUERED PROTAGONIST lies prone on stomach on stage center. LITTLE MAN sits on OBP's back banging his head into the stage floor. OBP is helpless to resist as HE IS ONLY 5 YEARS OLD.

Narrator holds a microphone to the mouths of the characters not unlike a sports interviewer to capture their dialogue.

Little Man: Don't you know it takes hard work and responsibility to get ahead in life? You can't go out and play all the time!

You gotta roll up your shirtsleeves and sweat and struggle and suffer and die if you wanna make it in the world!

OBP: But I'm only 5 years old!

LM: Shuttup! No backtalk! No arguing!

1st FINGER WAGGING PLATITUDE UTTERER (bending down to condescendingly wag his finger at OBP): Children are to be seen and not heard.

OBP: But I'm only 5 years old!

LM: Shuttup! Get Serious! Potential is nice, promise is OK, BUT PERFORMANCE  IS EVERYTHING!! (bitterly, with bile and a shaking head and a shaking voice) GET THE FUCKING JOB DONE!

OBP: But I'm only 5 years old!

LM:  Shuttup! Your mother told me you lost one of your galoshes. Don't you know that if you were in the Marines at boot camp and you lost a galosh your drill sergeant would force you to carry the other one around in you teeth for a week!

OBP: But I'm not a Marine! I'm only 5 years old!

LM: Shuttup! No backtalk!


2 men and 3 women take turns striding up to OBP on the floor as LM continues to smash his head into the stage floor. They bend down to OBP and condescendingly wag their forefingers at him as LM holds up his head to hear their scoldings. OBP is rolling eyes, drooling, and clearly feeling the effects of the head-banging torture.


God only makes you suffer what you are able to bear.
It takes more muscles to frown that it does to smile.
You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.
If the glass half empty or is it half full?
All evildoers will go to Hell and be punished on the Judgement Day.
A stitch in time saves nine.
A penny saved is a penny earned.
Don't count your chickens before they're hatched.
The good guys always win.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
Silence is golden.
If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.
Do as I say, not as I do.
Winning isn't the main thing; it's the ONLY thing.
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
God works in mysterious ways. It was God's will that everyone died in that catastrophic train wreck!
If you work hard enough and apply yourself you'll earn a hefty promotion.
You'll understand better when you grow up.
Smile and the whole world smiles with you, cry and you cry alone.
God created us all equal.
Winning is everything.
(Each FINGER WAGGING PLATITUDE UTTERER needs to memorize 4-5 platitudes here--there's 22 total. Allow each actor to choose those platitudes that make them the angriest: that way they'll utter them with more sarcastic conviction.)

NARRATOR: Shortly after this unfortunate scenario occurred the vice squad raided the local whorehouse. The LITTLE MAN narrowly escaped to Europe with one of the whores and with a suitcase full of money he embezzled from the bank where he held a respectable position as a trustee.

Band with vocalist performs 2 songs:

4. Lies

5. Vaulting Over Her Walls

Band performs background vamp behind 'TV Rant':

6. The Sound Of Distant Music


A lone TV sits upon a tall, four-legged stool. It flickers typical images from TV: talking heads, commercials, titillation, stupidity. If cable can feed the images, fine. If not, a VCR with VHS tape programs the standard TV images. TV must be small enough to be smashed with a sledgehammer to dramatic effect. VHS player must be inexpensive enough to not cause its owner distress when it is destroyed along with the TV. A sledgehammer is concealed behind one of the PA columns or elsewhere where it is within handy reach of the ranting narrator yet concealed from the view of the audience.


O great destroyer of human potential
O time-wasting blatherer of the electronic vox
O sucker of time of the blood of our lives
Shuttup, you stupid box!

O vomiter of vast stupidities
O eternal sexual titillator never yielding a gratification payoff of our tumescent attentions
O stupid selling messages with absolutely no relevance to our lives
Shuttup, you stupid box!

O unintelligent screamers wallowing in Jerry Springer's cesspool
O titty-flashing GIRLS GONE WILD who'll never give me their numbers
O wriggling, slimy lamprey sucking the time out of our lives
Shuttup, you stupid box!

O vacant spewer of buy this, buy that
O lying car commercials of lonesome roads in ethereal landscapes
Rather than the constipated urban wretchedness you shat upon my world
O scolding, hateful, partisan political bickerers predictably whacking each other with chatter bludgeons yet never creating anything of lasting value or transcendence
Shuttup, you stupid box!

O embarrassingly stupid comedies and meaningless melodramas of soap operas torturing emotions into Gordian knots for no discernible reason
O tiresome cops and robbers cat and mouse car chases neatly resolving horrendous problems within an hour
(Just like real life!)--
Of what value are these contrived nightmares to us?
Our time we waste entranced by your stupid images we create nothing useful, beautiful, meaningful, or valuable with our lives
So shuttup, you stupid box!
Each day we ineluctably descend keening, careening,
Hurtling evermore rapidly towards our graves
Yet our days wasted, passively observing as drooling mongoloid infants, your embarrassing bombast
O images devoid of meaning
O spewer of lies
O vomiter of vast stupidities
O Empire of unnecessary duplicates whose purpose of existence is to be passively entertained by blathering idiocy; such is the decadence of our times
Shuttup, you stupid box!

Shuttup, you stupid box!

Shuttup, you stupid box!

TV, I kill you now!
Narrator then picks up hidden sledgehammer and swings it, full force, at the TV screen. The TV smashes and violently topples to the stage floor along with the stool and VHS player.
Narrator then stands over the smashed TV, cursing at it and spitting on it as actors and musicians and dancers gather in a mob around it, aping the behavior of the narrator.
Mob then disperses. Stagehand removes mess.


NARRATOR: After Our Beleaguered Protagonist escapes the idiocies of the finger wagging platitude utterers and the vampiric timesuck of the TV box, he ventures into the CITY OF ARTIFICIAL EXCITEMENT to make money and take advantage of all the attractive career opportunities that can only be found in locales of CONCENTRATED URBAN SQUALOR. He spends his nights at a GROOVY NIGHTCLUB where he repeatedly fails to obtain the phone numbers of young women who are only there to flirt, dance, get drunk, and then brag about it the next day at work.

At THE GROOVY NIGHTCLUB OF ARTIFICIAL EXCITEMENT OBP encounters loud, pulsating music that changes with the times but is always regarded as hip, whatever it is. Nude Go-Go girls in thigh-high white plastic boots undulate on little risers by the DJ's booth. Sometimes groovy bands play senseless music artificially contrived by SATANIC SONGWRITERS to induce the club patrons to drink more so the club owner can garner ever larger profits so he can throw ever more lavish sex orgies with paid NUDE ESCORTS in his hot-tub at his estate up in the hills.

OBP dances in imaginary nightclub with dancers to next 2 tunes.

Band with performs 1 tunes:

7. City Nights Of Artificial Excitement (instrumental)

Band with singer performs 1 song:

8. The Dream


NARRATOR: OUR BELEAGUERED PROTAGONIST eventually finds gainful employment filing paperwork at a hedge fund.
Three unpleasant, ill-tempered women hector and berate OPB at the firm. The women wear pants, of course, and football shoulder pads OVER their shirts.
In the course of daily work at the firm OBP runs an imaginary gauntlet in which he crawls on the stage floor while the 3 bitches beat him with large flesh-colored latex dildos which are designed to closely resemble male sex organs. The bitches loudly berate and excoriate OBP while he crawls back and forth under the gauntlet.
The Narrator OR one of the male characters who represents LUCRE LUST holds a short stick or pole from which a large carrot dangles on a stick. Tied to the string near the carrot is a wad of green paper currency. The symbolism of this prop is obvious. Narrator OR LUCRE LUST dangles the cash/carrot combo in front of OPM throughout THE GAUNTLET sequence, goading, teasing, and humiliating him.

Band with singer performs 1 song during THE GAUNTLET sequence:

9. 3 Bitches

Band with singer performs 1 song immediately after THE GAUNTLET sequence:

10. Hag Marcella


NARRATOR: OUR BELEAGUERED PROTAGONIST flees the 3 bitches and the rotten job at the hedge fund and escapes to the desert. He has reached his threshold of abuse by other people and now fully appreciates Jean-Paul Sartre's quote:

"Hell is other people."

He wanders solo into the vast desert plains, far away from any other human being, falls asleep nder the desert stars, and dreams deeply...

(OBP wanders slowly across stage as if on long walk, slowly grows tired, and falls asleep in fetal position in stage center. He remains there throughout the next 4 tunes.)

Guitarist performs solo piece:

11. Deserts Of Eternity

Band with singer performs 3 songs:

12. Christina's Lullaby
13. Song Of The Tiger
14. Dark Is The Night

Band and/or Jack Vees perform background vamp:

15. Social Revelations


NARRATOR:  From his prolonged desert hermitage OUR BELEAGUERED PROTAGONIST again descends into the world of puny men to earn wages to prevent his utter starvation. His perceptions and evaluations of human social interactions have been profoundly transformed as a result of his time in the desert.

He observes 2 people, 2 men, talking. In his previous life he would have observed just that: 2 people talking. With the filters on his brain opened wider he perceives 2 men as demented puppets whapping each other with the bludgeons of their talk, each attempting to dominate the other in some twisted Punch & Judy show.

(2 actors stiffly take turns babbling scolding gibberish to the other, then mildly whacking the other on the shoulder with an exclamatory grunt. This sequence continues on for a few minutes as the point of its tiresomeness is made.)

NARRATOR: OBP perceives groups and collectives and organizations battling each other in an eternal tug of war which, despite all the yelling and screaming and triumphant crowing by these various belligerent teams about their great progress in achieving their ends, no net gains are ever made by either side. The middle of the tug of war rope always remains firmly in the middle after each boisterous campaign.
(6 actors enact a game of tug of rope with a large rope. It is noted that the center of the rope has not changed position at the end of the game.)
OBP watches one man lecturing another man about the "rules of society" and perceives the imaginary concept "society" as a large black bludgeon with which the one man dominates the other.
(2 actors enact this argument with the dominating one using a large black bludgeon with the word SOCIETY painted on it to repeatedly whap the other man about the head and shoulders as he lectures to him about following "The Rules Of Society".)

Band with singer performs 1 song:

16. Triumph Of The Damned (instrumental)

Band performs background vamp for Myth of The Starving Dog:

17. Myth of The Starving Dog


NARRATOR: OUR BELEAGUERED PROTAGONIST  dreams this awful nightmare one unpleasant night. He dreams he is walking in a desert and he sees, off in the heat-shimmering  distance, barely discernible figures moving about. As he approaches the figures he notices one figure is a woman with an object in her hands surrounded by strange creatures in submissive yet aggressively begging positions at her feet.
OBP at this point senses a strange hunger and discovers he's stumbling over his 2 feet, so he begins walking on all 4 limbs as does a dog. As he draws nearer to these figures in the desert he beholds a grotesque spectacle...
OBP crawls up to a scene of  a vampish sexpot woman in thigh-high pink plastic boots, fishnet stockings, a micro skirt, some revealing upper garment, and a black choke collar. The woman holds a pink purse whose opening is lined with black fuzz and whose front and back faces feature novelty store tits and ass, respectively, affixed to them. 3 dogmen cavort at the woman's feet--snarling, biting, attacking, and simply behaving rudely towards the woman who impassively flings large, raw porterhouse steaks to them and on them.

The woman, LADY WITH THE PINK PURSE/SEXPOT VAMP, manifests the demeanor of a zombie. Her actions are those of an entranced automaton; a startling lack of awareness and an instinctive, dreamlike quality characterizes her movements. Her body movements are somnambulantly mechanical while feeding the dogmen.

She never directly looks at OPB or acknowledges him other than by brusquely pushing away his heart box when it comes too close to her.

OBP/dogman seeks to get hunk of meat from the woman and waits patiently and obediently in a begging posture by her. She ignores him.
 OBP/dogman retrieves a large heart-shaped Valentine's type box concealed offstage or behind PA column. The other dogmen continue snarling at and biting the vamp women who impassively continues flinging them raw meat out of her grotesque pink purse.
The 3 dogmen exhibit distinctive personalities:

THE CHAIN SMOKER is a chain smoker whose mouth is crammed with a ludicrous number of unlit cigs which he attempts to light with a long-flamed lighter.

THE LIAR has bongo drums hanging from a strap around his neck which he alternately waters with a child's gaily decorated flower watering can and drums upon to garner the woman's favor and attention.

THE DRUGGIE ties off with a rubber hose and shoots up with a comically oversized hypodermic needle. He nods off lying flat on the stage floor as the woman flops a raw steak onto his face.

At one point THE LIAR thrusts his phone number on a scrap of notebook paper into the woman's face. She impassively stuffs the paper into her bra and flings him some meat. His face is animated and he is the dogman equivalent of a social butterfly, blabbering blandishments and vacuous chatter between the snarls and aggressive, doglike gestures.

OBP/dogman proffers the Valentine's heart box to the vamp. She firmly pushes it away in annoyance. OPM several times repeats offer, vamp woman repeatedly pushes it way with increasing irritation.
Finally vamp woman rudely smacks/punches the heart box out of OPM/dogman's hand and it sails across the stage. OBP/dogman crawls across stage to the box, looks at it, dolefully looks back at the woman who continues to ignore him, stops crawling on all fours, regains his legs, and walks away without looking back at the grotesque scenario of the vamp woman feeding the vicious dogmen.

NARRATOR loudly stops BG music of band as near silence envelopes the stage. The Dogman continue to snarl at and paw the SEXPOT VAMP.

NARRATOR with a microphone amidst the silence interviews VAMP.

NARRATOR: What a minute, what a minute, what exactly is going on here?

VAMP (with somnambulant Forrest Gump accent): Ah don't know. Ah'm jest an insensate zombie. Ah don't know what the hell ah'm doin'.

NARRATOR:  But OUR BELEAGUERED PROTAGONIST here is starving to death, he hasn't been fed in ages, and is offering you something of substantial value--yet you blindly feed only the most severely brain-damaged, inferior, subhuman DOGMEN with obvious character defects and addictions galore who only lie to you, bite you, snarl at you, disrespect you, and give you nothing of lasting value.

Why? WHY are you doing this?

VAMP: Why, I don't know. It's jest chemistry ah s'pose!

NARRATOR (barely containing his anger, becoming nauseous): Chemistry? CHEMISTRY?! Yeah, it's chemistry, all right!

NARRATOR crumples to the stage blasting obnoxious retching and snorting sounds closely into the microphone as the band begins to squeal and create a din of chaotic noise behind him. After a minute or so of this madness the band continues its earlier MYTH OF THE STARVING DOG background vamp.
One dancer/actor/musician walks to heart box on stage and balances it upright on its tip as would a football player setting up a football for a goal kick. NARRATOR takes a few swift running strides to the heart box as would an NFL quarterback and kicks it out of view behind a PA column or backstage.

Band with singer performs 1 song:

18. World Of Misery


NARRATOR: As an inevitable result of recurring personal frustrations and disappointments OUR BELEAGUERED PROTAGONIST could not help but perceive all the darkness he felt in his soul as projections out upon an unkind and antagonistic universe...

Screen descends, WORLD AGONY PROCESSIONAL video short is projected on screen while band performs 1 tune:

19. World Agony Processional

NARRATOR: Our Beleaguered Protagonist ultimately realizes that despite the world's many miseries he must will himself to happiness if he is to remain alive. He starts to ignore the many stupidities that make him sad and pays attention to the things he loves-- such as listening to beautiful music...

Band performs 1 tune:

20. Round & Round

Actors & dancers dance and mug and cavort to jazz waltz in uptempo 6/8 meter.

Band performs opening instrumental theme music:

21. The Electric Love Nudity Supreme
22. Struggling Against Bullshit & Lies (Ratface Theme)





Zappa (Re)Coverband The FoolZ will be performing on sunday, february 8, 2004 at 'De Kroeg' in Arnhem, The Netherlands. Gig kicks off at 20:30 h.

More info at or

And if you want the Foolz to open Zappanale, go to and vote for them.


Here's Roddie Gilliard with the latest on the Muffin Men:

muffin men newsletter feb 2004

Hi everyone, and welcome, here is our first bunch of neuwz for 2004!

the UK TOUR DATES for april and may, once again we play in England, Ireland and Wales, the current listing can be found on the website.  there are also new audio clips and a Free Competition where you can win the muffin men CD of your choice!

we are attempting to collate stuff from our archive into a DVD, exactly what form this will eventualy take remains to be seen, but it will be some form of anthology/history type thing.  we are still seeking good quality audio, video and still/artifact material, so if you have anything useful let us know.

CDs can now be ordered directly from the site, using paypal secure credit card transactions.  currently there are copies of the last 3 muffinz CDs "bakers dozen" "live @the cavern" "more songs..." and also "when worlds coliide" (our serious project with ensemble 10:10)  Occasionally we find the odd copy of some long gone releases and put them up, best check to see what's there!

there are just a handfull of t-shirts left, again available directly from the site
Zappanale14 - the German Zappa festival we played last summer - a whole bunch of stuff now available, 3xCD and 3 different DVDS - more news to appear on the website very soon!
various muffinz have been busy playing sessions with other people, as well as projects of their own.  JCB and friz (along with Ian Gardiner) have been recording tracks for an album by ella garu, a liverpool based band - you heard it here first!  friz has been busy composing music for the 100 year celebration of Liverpool Anglican Cathedral.  tilo is on tour in austria, no doubt practicing his native tongue...

the forthcoming liverpool show could possibly include a special set by original muffin men, more later!

there are rumours of some "when worlds collide" shows later in the year, more news when we have it.

meanwhile keep checking the sites for competitions and other shit



LOS ANGELES - Rose Marie Zappa, the mother of the late musician Frank Zappa, died Thursday. She was 91.

Zappa died at a Burbank convalescent hospital, said daughter Patrice Zappa, who added her mother had been in declining health.

"We were with her today, talking to her and letting her know we loved her," Patrice Zappa said.

Zappa was born in the United States, the daughter of Italian immigrants. She and her husband married in Baltimore in 1939 and moved to San Diego 15 years later.

In addition to her daughter, she is survived by sons Robert and Carl and eight grandchildren.

Frank Zappa died of prostate cancer in 1993 at age 52.



Last month, I told you that Marc Guillermont recorded an album called "Zappostrophe", a Zappa tribute album.

Marc Guillermont was kind enough to send some extra info:
You can find extra info at:
and Marc's website is at:

More info soon.



2004/01/31, Fred Hemmer said:

Subject: Bogus Pomp news

Hi gang,

The Bogus Pomp Acoustic Band will perform at the Palladium in St. Petersburg on Saturday, March 27. Showtime is 8:00. I will write later with additional details.

-- Fred


the concert calendar * the concert calendar