sir millard mulch

how to sell the whole f#@!ing universe to everybody
    = carl king, feat. morgan agren, devin townsend

sir millard mulch (carl king): guitar, bass, sequencing, vocals
virgil donati
dave meros
nick d'virgilio
lale larson
morgan ågren: drums
larry boothroyd
nils frykdahl
mark critchley
ian strong
will maier
chris parsons
devin townsend
paul mazurkiewicz

all songs composed, recorded, produced, mixed and mastered by sir millard mulch

disc one

1. principles of egyptian salesmanship
2. dr. whilton poplle's personal slave II
3. fantastic!
4. brian tracy caesar salad
5. chariots of the sales gods
6. i'm an artist and i sholdn't have to work for a living!
7. hardball 2 (estradasphere)
8. cap'n jack's straight-from-the-can applesfish!
9. james pitts in bondage IV : moving target
10. maximum volumizer
11. higher (creed)
12. h2o2verphone telethon
13. the boy with the perfectly square butthole strikes back
14. drinkt the secret milkshake
15. every child is a creator
16. i don't wanna be a salesman!
17. ring around the hedgehog
18. metronomes & make-up
19. you're not my hero anymore
20. brunch with bronco nagasaki
21. not ready for retail?
22. check out our exclusive fall season spectacular of indestructible bra hooks
23. when the sales gods compute your karmic worth, you can join your mystic brethren in the centerof the earth
24. let's move (dance mix)
25. the monkey steals the peaches
26. fake boobies!
27. how to pretend you're stuped like everyone else so you can become gainfully employed and enjoy limited time on this fucking useless planet in just five-zillion easy steps!
28. i hate retro!
29. pokin gthe eye of the beholder
30. prelude to mundus imaginalis
31. dennis rodman fukking basketball 1998
32. mary go buy, buy, buy, buy, buy, buy, buy, buy, buy, buy!
33. ultimate radio interview that will make me famous forever
34. the world is brainwashed catering, llc

disc two

1. what is the concept behind this huge, unlistenable album?
2. hemisphere III: hermes
   1. all hail hermes!
   2. the sacred craft
   3. foundations of ironicynicism in the 21st century
   4. how to sell the whole f#@!ing universe to everybody, once and for all!
   5. come sale way (styx)
   6. the thirteen beautiful brazen pillars of nicompoopery
   7. the final battle between art & commerce
   8. executive producer brings the rock opera to a cost-effective ending
   9. all hail hermes! (reprise)
3. if a composer falls in the woods...
4. tj's original surrogate activity soup! (made from 100% instead of ingredients!)
5. the best job in the world (sales is)
6. the ultimate artistic medium is the consciousness of other people
7. food pirates of galpheve IV
8. normal life is boring!
9. no-no, the headless ant
10. there's a market for everything but me
11. god bless the riaa!
12. coagula et solve or something
13. bad imitation of buckethead?
14. food magnetizer
15. how to quit your job and make millions!
16. sir millard mulch's olde tyme parade of magickal amusements
17. from selling nothing to selling nothing
18. and the merchants of earth shall weep and mourn
19. shipt from an old minutemen song
20. i'm just an artsy chick with an acoustic guitar (you think)
21. geophagyopathy & you
22. the modern day comparison refuses to die!
23. saleswoman of the year
24. unknown triumph (schlegel)
25. and now, the moment you've all been waiting for...
26. the sorld's greatest salesman!
27. all sales finale!
28. the great strength of our professional affiliations / how to spend music industry currency
29. bankruptcy & beyond!
30. wom battle them (-$6,000)